As the saying goes,
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."
But how untrue this is! Many of us have felt the sting of harsh words—wounds that linger long after the moment has passed. Sadly, these words often build up, leading to more unkindness and deeper hurt. The tongue, though small, holds immense power.
Consider what the book of James says about this:
"Look, we put bits in the mouths of horses for them to obey us, and we turn their body. Look at the ships, too: although they are so big and driven by strong winds, they are turned by a very small rudder wherever the pilot intends. So, too, the tongue is a little member, yet it boasts greatly. See how a little fire kindles a great forest!" – James 3:3-5
With our words, we have two choices: to bless or to curse. The passage goes on to say how the same tongue can bless Elohim and then curse man, who is made in Elohim's likeness. This contradiction highlights the need for careful speech.
Proverbs offers further insight into the power of words—not just what we say, but how we say it:
"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up displeasure." – Proverbs 15:1
"Rash speaking is like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise is healing." – Proverbs 12:18
Taking a moment "to breathe" can diffuse tension in the heat of an argument. Rash words often escalate conflict, while gentle, kind words promote healing and understanding.
"The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but violence covers the mouth of the wrong." – Proverbs 10:11
"Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." – Proverbs 16:24
Our words should build up, not tear down. This includes being mindful of what we share about others—protecting the dignity of close friends and family by avoiding embarrassing or unkind remarks.
One final verse serves as a guiding principle:
"So then, my beloved brothers, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not work the righteousness of Elohim." – James 1:19-20
Knowing when to be righteously angry is challenging, and our anger is often misplaced. Therefore, we should think before we speak, answer softly during conflict, and always strive to speak life.
May our words reflect the love and wisdom of Elohim, bringing healing, shalom, and encouragement to all around us.
Shalom,
JS